Ocho

In class this week, we talked about counselling with your family and the importance of family counsels. I think it is so wise to have a regular family counsel because it helps bring the family together to figure out/work on things together. I can think of no better way to have everyone say what they need help with or what they are working on, etc. than in a family counsel.

It is important in family counsel (and in all counsels) that everybody get an equal opportunity to talk and voice their opinions. Lots of times, husbands and fathers think that because they are the "head of the house" that they are the one who makes all of the decisions, but that is so not true. If everybody involved has the same chance to talk about their thoughts, ideas, and feelings families can be brought closer together and issues in families can be resolved. That is what I love about family counsels. I think that life is too short to spend time holding grudges and being angry over petty things, so a great place to resolve those issues, where all people involved will have their feelings protected and where everyone will be safe is in a family counsel.

I remember only once or twice having family counsel growing up and I wish my parents would have done it more with us. I want to have a regular family counsel with my wife and family. My wife and I don't regularly have an official "family counsel", but we do talk about plans, schedules, thoughts, feelings, and problems. I think that I will talk to her about making them more official and having them more regularly so that it becomes a habit, and then when we have kids, it will just be something that we do.

Siete

This week in class we talked about crisis' that occur in families. Every person will at some point in their lives go through a crisis (whether it be your dog running away, a tornado, or your mom passing away). Something that really stuck out to me when talking about crises is that people often see a crisis as a "problem", but if you have a strong family unit, with clear boundaries and strong relationship, almost every crisis can turn into a positive event that can bring the family together. 

Earlier this year, my brother-in-law who was serving a mission was hit by a car. He had very serious head trauma, and for the first few days we didn't know if he was going to live. He has since returned home and is doing quite well. He is still going through rehab, but he is going to make a full recovery and is going to return to the mission field as soon as he can (he REALLY wants to get back out there, if it were up to him he would already be back out). This event had the potential to be devastating to my family, especially my father-in-law who felt helpless and was taking it very hard. But because of the strong family structure, the relationships that my family has with each other, and the gospel, this crisis which occurred was able to bring the family closer together. I will always remember the first day when my brother-in-law came home and we all sat together in the living room pondering about what we had all gone through the past 5 months and then praying together as a family. That was a very special and sacred moment for all of us.

Crises don't have to have negative results. Families can get through crises together.

Seis

This week in class we talked about intimacy in marriage. I think it is important that a husband and wife openly discuss intimacy. It is a very important part in marriage, and it can and should be something that is shared between husband and wife.

Before my wife and I were married, she was given a book called, "And They Were Not Ashamed". It is by an LDS author, and it is about intimacy in marriage. It talks about what to expect and how to make intimacy something enjoyable for both husband and wife. It uses scriptures and quotes from Prophets and Apostles and, it is just an amazing book. It was really helpful for both of us to read it together and to talk about intimacy and what to expect. We started reading it about 3 or so weeks before we got married, and every few days we would read a chapter and talk about it. Reading this book really helped me and my wife understand intimacy better and it helped us know kind of what to expect. I think that because we read that book, we are able to be open with each other and are better able to enjoy special, sacred intimate time together. If you are engaged and about to get married, I strongly suggest reading this book.